A short eulogy, in your words

Three minutes is about 400 words, and it is enough. Tell us about them for ten minutes, talking or typing, and read the opening free. It’s drafted by AI, only from what you tell us. £39 if you want the rest.

Free to start. No card, no account. Read an example first.

  • Talk or type, about ten minutes
  • Read the opening free
  • £39 only if you want the rest
  • Full refund within 14 days
  • Drafted by AI from your words
“Put the kettle on,/then we’ll see.”//If you ever took a problem to my mum,/that’s what you got.Not advice./Not a fuss./The kettle.And somehow,/by the bottom of the cup,/it was usually a smaller problem.
Sample reading copy · the / marks are pauses1 of 4

If you’ve been given a few minutes

Short and true is enough

Crematorium slots are often tight, and a short eulogy is easier to read with a tight throat. At the pace people speak at a funeral, three minutes is about 400 words, five is about 650 and seven is about 900. You choose the length, and we write to it.

  • Ask how long you have

    The celebrant or funeral director will know. If they’ve given you a time, choose the length nearest to it.

  • One story, not the whole life

    A short eulogy is one true story and two small details. The facts people expect take a few sentences.

  • Short sentences

    One idea each, in the words you’d use at the kitchen table. They are easier to say, and easier to pick up again if you have to stop.

  • A last line you can manage

    Keep it short enough to say with a wobble in your voice. Our full example ends on five words.

Every eulogy comes with a large-print reading copy: one breath to a line, with the pauses marked. It is fine to cry. The copy is made so you can find your place again.

Why it sounds like them

We ask the way a good listener would

A eulogy is only as good as the memories in it. So this isn’t a form. Say they were stubborn and we’ll ask for a time they were. Tell us a story and we’ll ask what they said next. Those small true details are what the room will recognise.

Tap the microphone and say it the way you’d tell a friend. You may find you remember more out loud. If you’d rather type, type.

  • You can see everything we’ve kept, at any time
  • A few follow-up questions at most, and you can skip any of them
  • Stop whenever you need to. It will be here when you come back
From our fictional sample. Susan says her mum was stubborn, so the next question asks for a time she was. Three things she said have been kept.

Making it right

Two rounds of changes, and questions first

Put everything you’d like different in one go, the way you’d say it to a friend: “add the caravan”, “too long”, “a gentler ending”. Before we rewrite, we ask about anything unclear, so the new version is right first time.

  • A round is used when we rewrite it for you. Answering our questions, or adding family memories, never uses one
  • What changed is underlined. Everything else stays exactly as it was, in case you’ve practised it
  • Both versions are kept, so you can switch back at any time
From our fictional sample. Susan asked for two changes. Each got one question first: what always happened at the caravan, and what “less sad” means to her.

Then, in the new version

The new sentence is underlined, and it is made only of what Susan asked for and what she answered.

For the day itself

A copy made for reading aloud

Writing it is half the worry. Standing up and reading it is the other half. So every eulogy comes with a reading copy:

  • One breath to a line, so you never run out of air mid-sentence
  • Pauses marked: / for a beat, // to let a moment land
  • Names in bold, so you can look up and find your place again
  • Large, clear print that works through tears and without your glasses

Look up at the end of a line, not the middle. Nobody minds a pause.

So, Mum./Thank you.For the gloves,/and the beans,/and the minibus,/and the Sundays.//We’ll turn up.(breathe)I’ll put the kettle on.
Dot · read by Susan4 of 4

The last page of our fictional sample. It prints on A4 at 18 point. Fold it in three and it fits an inside pocket.

How it works

  1. Talk to us about them

    Tap the microphone and talk, or type. We listen, and now and then ask a little more, the way a celebrant would at your kitchen table. About ten minutes. Skip whatever you like.

  2. Read how it begins

    Tell us where to send it, and read the opening straight away. If it doesn’t sound like them, add a detail and we’ll write it again, free.

  3. Make it yours

    The full eulogy is £39, paid once. Two rounds of changes are included: tell us everything you’d like different, we ask about anything unclear, then rewrite. Then print your reading copy.

An example

When I was nine I left my bike out, and the bin lorry ran over it.

I thought Dad would go mad. He just looked at it for a while. Then he said, “It’ll mend,” and he carried it down to the shed. Three nights later it was back. Straighter than when it was new. And green. It had been red. Green was the paint he had.

From a sample eulogy for a dad called Ken, just under three minutes long, written from a fictional set of answers so you can see what to expect. Theirs will be made of their own sayings and stories. Read all of it.

Paid once. No subscription.

The conversation and the opening are free. You only pay if you want the rest.

The full eulogy

  • In your voice, for 3, 5 or 7 minutes
  • Two rounds of changes. We ask about anything unclear before we rewrite
  • Your family’s memories, woven in the way you choose
  • Large-print reading copy with pauses marked
  • Yours to keep as a PDF and a Word document

£39

paid once
Start free

Full refund, no reason needed, up to 14 days after you pay.

Drafted by AI, working only from what you tell us.

Plainly

How it’s written

Your eulogy is drafted by AI, working only from what you tell us. It’s told never to invent a name, a story or a fact, and a second check reads every draft against your answers. Where something’s missing, it asks you. You check every line before you use it.

We say so plainly because you ought to know, and because it’s why this costs £39, where a professional writer often charges two hundred pounds or more. The memories are yours. The shaping is ours. The final word is always yours.

What it does
Asks about them, the way a celebrant would. Drafts the eulogy from your answers. Checks the draft against them, line by line.
What it never does
Invent a name, a story or a fact. Pretend to be a person. Learn from what you tell it: your words are not used to train AI.
Where your words are kept
Encrypted, in the UK. The AI model that drafts from them runs in the EU, under a contract that forbids using your words for training.
How long for
Deleted 30 days after your last visit, or 30 days after the funeral date you gave us if that is later. You can delete everything sooner from your private link, or by emailing us. The details are in our privacy notice.

Questions people ask

What if I cry?

Then you cry, and nobody minds. Every person in the room is on your side. The reading copy is printed large, one breath to a line, so you can stop, breathe and find your place again. Give a spare copy to someone who could finish it for you. You almost certainly won’t need them to.

What if I don’t know what to say?

Half-sentences are fine. “He always had a mint in his pocket” is worth more than a paragraph of fine words. We’ll ask a little more where it helps, and you can skip any question after their name and yours.

How long should it be?

Three to five minutes is right for most services, and crematorium slots are often tight. At the pace people speak at a funeral, three minutes is about 400 words, five is about 650 and seven is about 900. You choose, and we write to it.

What if it isn’t right?

Two rounds of changes are included. Put everything you’d like different in one go; we’ll ask about anything unclear, then rewrite, and show you exactly what changed. If it still isn’t right, email us within 14 days of paying and we’ll refund you in full. You don’t need to give a reason.

Is a person writing this?

No. Your eulogy is drafted by AI, working only from what you tell us, and a second check reads every draft against your answers before you see it. You check every line before you use it. We say so plainly because you ought to know, and because it’s why this costs £39, where a professional writer often charges two hundred pounds or more.

Start with their name.

The rest will come. We’ll help.

Free to start. No card, no account. Drafted by AI from your words.